Thursday, August 2, 2007
We can go camping and make moose sounds
Hey, hey! It's that time of year again! It's the time of year everyone loves. It's training camp time. You know what that means, right? Actual football games are going to be played...and soon. It's the best time of year for football fans. You see, every team in the league has sky-high expectations (well - except for the Chiefs. I'm sure they just wish they could go back to the glory days. What glory days you ask? Hmm....good point). Even ever-pathetic franchises like the Lions, Browns, Cardinals and Raiders have playoff aspirations. I even saw where Jon Sh(k)itna predicted the Lions would win 10 games. Isn't that cute?
Symbolically, training camp is the unofficial start of the season and that's great news for everyone, but it simply isn't that big of a deal.
Dont get me wrong, it's great to hear that tough guy Domenik Hixon came back to practice one day after separating his shoulder. It's great to hear that Shanny has told Rod he's got a spot on the team regardless of whether or not he can go on opening day. And on the flip side, it sucks to hear that Mike Bell has been crapping his pants and that Brandon Marshall is acting like a pantywaist malingerer. It really sucks to hear that Warrick Holdman had to be carted off the field this morning with a scary neck injury (looks like he'll be ok).
Training camp is about installing the playbook and keeping your significant contributors healthy. Look, I'm as interested in finding out who will be on the final roster as anyone, but it's really pointless. What's the use in slobbering all over yourself trying to figure out who will be the fifth wideout or the eighth linebacker or the ninth O-lineman when, barring catastrophic injury, that guy is going to be deactivated for 16 straight weeks? Does it make that big of a difference which guy is walking around in street clothes on the sideline sending his boys text messages? There are camp battles for what, maybe 3 or 4 starting jobs? Every other spot is locked in. We pretty much already know who's on the team and who isn't. The only thing is to figure out where on the depth chart they're at.
The bottom line I guess is that I'm sick and tired of hearing Shanny say the word "competition." In every single interview, he says it roughly five hundred times. Hey Coach, here are some synonyms for competition: candidacy, contest, event, fight, horse-race, match, race, rivalry, strife, struggle and trial. Can you please try out one of those?