Golf!

The granddaddy of all of the celebrity golf tour events is next week, the American Century Championship from Lake Tahoe. John will be participating for the 19th straight year. He's the only guy to play in this tournament every year it's been held. He finished 10th last year.

So what does The G.O.A.T. have in his bag? A Ping Rapture driver, Ping G10 fairway woods and hybrid/recovery club, Ping i10 irons (4-9), a Scotty Cameron putter and the ball everyone on tour plays, the Titleist Pro V1x. The best part is that he only plays #7 balls. The one shown above also has the logo from his restaurant stamped on the side.

Other former Donks teeing it up next week: The Mastermind and Old Man Lynch. Jerry Rice is playing too, if you're dumb enough to consider him a former Bronco.

Predictions:
1) John finishes in the top ten.
2) Either Steve Bartkowski, Grant Fuhr, Dan Quinn, Rick Rhoden, Mark Rypien or Billy Jo Tolliver will win. One of them always does.
3) Shanny gives an awkward interview where he wishes the Donks and Coach Pyle nothing but the best. He'll be lying. He'll then go back to his hotel and light a Montecristo with one of Bowlen's $1000 bills.
4) Charles Barkley will snap hook a drive into the gallery and brain some idiot who was stupid enough to stand anywhere near Charles Barkley on a golf course.
5) I will do some sort of live blog or running diary of this event. It will be terrible awesome.

Turn the channel Stay tuned!

Happy 4th of July!

Denver Broncos Football Rules!

Nothing's happening. Gotta move the obits down the page, though. Maybe I'll put some vids up or something later this week right now.

Here's a pretty cool shot from the last time there was any real reason to celebrate Denver Broncos football. It still rules, though! Never forget, chumps.



If you look close, you won't see me. I was there somewhere, though.

This is now a celebrity obituaries blog

RIP, freakshow.

Sux

RIP

Huh? What? Smart decisions? From this franchise?

IN: Casey Wiegmann, C


The best FA pick-up last offseason. He was going into the last year of his contract and wanted some additional security as his career winds down. Here's how an adult goes about getting a new deal:

1) Don't beat on your lady friends.
2) Don't go on nationally televised shows and poorly defend your beating on lady friends.
3) Come to the OTA's and minicamps.
4) Act like a fucking professional.

OUT: Boss Bailey, LB



The worst FA pick-up of last season. The Boss of No Bosses. Guy couldn't stay on the field. He got a lot of guaranteed money, so this was an expensive mistake.

Also OUT: Phony Gwynn.

Shocker!

Marshall wants out:

This guy goes from "I'm not holding out" to "I want out" in like two weeks. I say let him go. You cannot give him a huge fucking contact with all of the nonsense hanging over his head.

The Donks have other ideas:

"We met after Pat's meeting with Brandon and are going to continue our dialogue with Brandon and his representative," said Broncos coach Josh McDaniels. "We look forward to having Brandon at training camp."

Translation: Fuck off. Keep holding out. Which doesn't make sense. If you stick to your guns and don't pay him and he doesn't get suspended and he holds out until week 7 or whenever it is that you have to report or it doesn't count as a full season contractually, there's no way he re-signs with us next offseason. And you get nothing for him.

This "I'm gonna show everyone who's the fucking boss around here" routine already cost us the best thing this team had going for it. No, get a first and a third for this giant fucking headache now and hope Coach Dipshit doesn't trade them for some magic beans or something.

I hear Jabar Gaffney's awesome anyway.