Ha-Ha Patrick Ramsey

First off, fuck Coach Sugar Smacks and Jay Cutler. Both of them were/are lying and/or acting like children. Fuck Sugar Smacks for thinking Cassel was a better option than Cutler. He's the only one that thinks so. Fuck Jay Cutler for (allegedly) demanding a trade after Jeremy Bates wasn't retained and for acting like a bitch about the entire thing. Quit pouting and act like a fucking man.

Now, on to the shit that matters: Transactions!

IN: Ronald Fields, DT. 5th year guy, part-time starter mired in SF for his entire career. Not much to get excited about here.

IN: Darrell Reid, DT. 5th year guy, no-time starter late of Indy. Supposedly a special teams "ace." Again, nothing exciting.

IN: Lamont Jordan, RB. Was washed up when he signed with Oakland three years ago, was washed up when he cried like a little bitch on the Denver sidelines a couple years back:



And I'm betting he's still washed-up. I look forward to openly mocking Lamont Jordan's little bitch-ass all through training camp. Because, lets face it...he's not making this fucking team.

IN: JJ Arrington, RB. The deal that almost wasn't, but then was. I'm glad this got done. JJ should be pretty good in this scheme. Oh wait...it's not the same scheme anymore. Whatever. I still like this one. A lot.

IN: Kenny Peterson, DT. One of the Donks own FA's. He's been the most consistent DT we've had over the last few years. That's not saying much...at all, but I guess it's worth a re-up.

And finally, the best news of all. Not for the guy we signed, but for the guy wer're going to lose as a result:

IN: Chris Simms, QB. He's got ties to the Donks already: permanent, gay ties. And he doesn't have a spleen! Even if he stinks the joint out, it's ok, because it means Patrick Ramsay's terrible ass will be riding the pine somewhere else. That is a good thing.