Wednesday, May 9, 2007

Some moron brought a cougar to a party and it went berserk

Nice to see Woody Paige, my second least favorite sports writer here in Denver (Kiszla, I'm looking at you), back firing off idiotic columns. Here's his latest masterpiece about how the Donks should immediately sign Keyshawn Johnson, because apparently he's the missing piece to the championship puzzle. If you're like me, you really don't want to click that link, so I'll save you the grief and just list a couple of his more nonsensical quotes here:

Mike Shanahan has utilized empty backfield, five-receiver sets in the past. Imagine Walker, Smith, Johnson, Marshall and Stokley on the field on the same play. Or consider Walker, Smith and Johnson in the game at the same time.

Now, I've been following this team very closely since the mid '80's or so, and I may be wrong on this, but I don't recall EVER seeing a 5 receiver set in a Shanahan offense. In fact, I can barely recall 4 receiver sets. If you see a four guys lined up as receivers in a certain formation, you can bet your sweet ass at least one of them is a TE split wide.

Johnson is exactly the man of experience the Broncos need to join their receiving corps.

Right, we're seriously thin at experienced receivers. Javon, Rod and Art Donovan's bastard child aren't experienced enough for ya? We'll keep 5, maybe 6 receivers on the active roster max, how many of those guys really need to be on the wrong side of 30? Woods finishes up with this gem:

Just give him the dadgum contract.

Typical Paige ass-clownery. I don't see why people in this town love this guy. They welcomed him back with open arms after his disastrous "Cold Pizza" stint...unbelievable. Yeah he's a homer, but these guys are supposed to be homers. No one wants to read a columnist who just rips on the team in every column he hands in (which is exactly why Kiszla is #1 on my hated columnist list - nothing but negativity from that drunk shit head). Woody should have been strung up or run out of town after his "Jagwads" column leading up to the Jacksonville game during the '96 playoffs. A column that several Jax players mentioned in their post game interviews as motivation for the biggest upset Denver's ever been on the losing end of.

Go back to New York, Woody. Please?


Hallux Valgus said...

Denver's used empty backfield sets, but it ALWAYS involves a running back going in motion. Maybe in Paige's mind that means Walker, since he vaguely recalls Walker running a reverse.

Commish CH said...

gee Woody, why not put in Rod Smith at QB, then you can techically have a 6 WR set? That would revolutinize the game!

Skip Bayless is laughing somewhere at you Woodrow.

Signal to Noise said...

Um...has it ever occurred to Paige, or anyone else getting paid to write crap like that, that Brandon Marshall is also on the roster (last I checked) and he and Cutler seem to have a good QB-WR repore? I saw some good throws and catches from those two last year.