Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Figures - UPDATE

IN: Samie Parker, WR

Of course. The guy I called a "warm body" yesterday is the guy they signed. The other guy? Who the fuck knows. We now have 10 wideouts on the roster, and I don't see us adding any more before camp. Aside from Marshall and Stokley, the list is a veritable who's who of american receiving nobodies. Such luminaries as Keary Colbert, Derrick Hamilton, Taylor Jacobs, Glenn "The Truth" Martinez, Marquay McDaniel, Cliff Russell and Edell Shephard grace the roster. Now that is a list! UPDATE: Derrick Hamilton is not on this list anymore. The squad dumped him and some TE I've never heard of earlier today. They'll probably fill the void with a third punter or something.

Look, Parker's not awful. He's certainly not any worse than Keary Colbert or any of the other clowns I mentioned, but no matter how bad a year he just had, Darrell Jackson is an order of magnitude better than any of them.

It seems to me that if you've got one of the best arms in the league AND your top wideout just slashed nerves, muscles and tendons in one of his arms AND your number two wideout is white, 32 and injury prone, you should probably look at an impact type of guy at that position.

Samie Parker and Keary Colbert are not impact type of players.

I don't really understand what the fuck is going on over at Dove Valley this offseason.

3 comments:

@slushygutter said...

I run a 16 team- yes, 16 team- fantasy football league, where the majority of teams start 3 WRs per week, and ALL of the luminary WRs you listed except Marshall are on the Waiver Wire every week. nice

Hercules Rockefeller said...

Yeah, we got a real high-powered offense over here. Nothin' but talent.

blairjjohnson said...

Samie, how I loved ya'. Samie, how I really love ya', now.